Well... I fucked up this time... But you know what? I took a stand, I took a chance at changing someone for hte better... and failed. I failed and now I have to pay the price. What price you say? Well, this time I get a choice, either say "I'm sorry" and HOPE to be forgiven or... server all ties with dan, tracy, and matt and move on... Well guess what, fuckers! I'm going with the second choice. So fuck off! And yes matt, you dumbass new anime DID arrive today and YES, I DID watch it. I watched it without you! HAHA. and you know? It sucked! I'm outta here! FUCK ALL Y'ALL!


...After 15 minutes of thinking on this post. I've decided to... think about it... I amy choose to ask forgiveness or simply walk away... Go groveling back to those I disagree with, or stand my ground. You tell me which is right, and I'll tell you my true feelings. (Notice I said nothing about you influencing my decision) P.S. I may choose to ignore your comments if I choose. This is my blog...

I stole this from Tracy and had a unfun time answering it....

001) What time are you starting this?: 9:49 P.M.
002) Name?: Rob Ducat
003) Date of birth?:may 16 1986
004) Sex?: Male
005) Height?: 5'12'
'006) Eye color?: Brown
007) Location?: Bowling Green
008) Where were you born?: Toledo
009) Do you have crush on someone?: yes, but who?
010) Do you have a bf/gf?: nope
011) What are you wearing right now?: Boxers, shorts, Wife Beater, Working T-shirt
012) Would you have sex before marriage?: too late for that
013) Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: umm... no
014) Do you smoke?: NO
015) Do you drink?: yes
016) Are you ghetto?:NO!! KEEP AWAY!
017)Are you a player?: umm... of video games
018)What are your favorite colors?: BLUE!
019)favorite animal?: EL Gato!
020) Do you have any birthmarks?: yep, on the back of ear...
021) Who do you talk to most on the phone?: I HATE the phone
022) Do you get online a lot?: HELL YEAH
023) Are you shy or outgoing?: shy
024) Do u hate school?: All of it except Drama
025) Do you have a social life?: Kinda
026) How easily do you trust people?: Kinda
027) Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: I usually tell them anyway
028) Would you ever sky dive?: maybe...
029) Do you like to dance?: not very good
030) Have you ever been out of state?: yes
031) Do you like to travel?: not really
032) Do you want to get out of your hometown?: I like where I am
033) Are you spoiled?: yes.. but i resent it
034) Are you a brat?: not really
035) Have you ever been dumped?: yeah
036) Have you ever gotten high?: nope, drunk though
037) What's your favorite drink?: Root Beer
038) Do you like Snapple?:never drink it
039) Do you drink a lot of water?: yes, it tastes like water
040) What toothpaste do you use?:umm... Plead the fifth
041) Do you have a cell phone or pager?: Just try and find me!
042) Do you have a curfew?: Not anymore!
043) Who do you look up to?: ANIME CHARACTERS
044) Are you a role model?: to fools?
045) What name brand do you wear the most?:No name Brand!.
046) What kind of jewelry do you wear?: umm... none
047) What do you have pierced? nothing! Bitch!
048) What do you want pierced?: my ego
049) Do you like taking pictures?: never do
050) Do you like getting your picture taken?:yeah
051) Do you have a tan?:Pasty white!
052) Do you get annoyed easily?: By Maggie
053) Have you ever started a rumor?: Probably
054) Do you have your own phone/phone line?: no
055) Do you have your own pool?:no
056) Do you have any siblings?: yeah, 9! Mostly half
057) Do you prefer boxers or briefs?: boxers
058) Have you ever been played?: umm... what?
059) Have you ever played anyone?: maybe... THE FIFTH
060) Do you get along with your parents?: yes, very
062) How do you vent your anger?: Yell (non verbably)
063) Have you ever ran away?: no
064) Have you ever been fired from a job?: no job to be fired from
065) Do you even have a job?: look at the previous question
066) Do you daydream a lot?: yes
067) Do you have a lot of exes?: 3 or 4
068) Do you run your mouth?: I'm usually quiet... Usually...
069) What do you want a tattoo of?:I don't want to PERMANTLY deface my body
070) What do you have a tattoo of?: none
071) What are your favorite flowers?: I don't like flower
072) What do you look like?: CRAZY!
073) What does your most recent crush look like?: Umm... sexy?
074) Have you ever been b*ed out?: HELL YEAH
075) When was the last time you b*ed someone out?: Maggie!
076) Are you rude?:if you make me angry
077) What was the last compliment you received?: "You're crazy!" -someguy I was playing Halo with online
078) Do you like getting dirty?: You want to get dirty with me?
079) Is your bellybutton an innie or outie?: BOTH!
080) Are you flexible?: YES!
081) What is your heritage?: Hell if I know
082) What is your lucky number?:11
083) What does your hair look like right now?:brown and long
084) Could you ever be a vegetarian?:I would die of malnutrition
085) How hot would you rate youself on a scale of 1-10?: anywhere between 1 and 10
086) Do you sleep in any unusual positions?: yes, but it's hard to describe

So... It's been awhile. You guys still listening? I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. It's not that I've been done SOO much I haven't the energy to post, just the opposite! I've been more or less great for about a week now. Unfortuately I've annoyed quite a few people with my hyperness. I've been feeling great, and in there lies the problem. I'm TOO great. I have SOO much to worry about for me to be this good. I'm going to start college in 10 days! and i've prepared only as much as my mother has made me, I'm not ready to get a job, and I'm not ready to say goodbye to my friends! That's the worst part, saying good bye to Ian. He's been my best friend for most of my high school years. And in less than a month he'll be gone, probably for a long time. I don't want to lose him, and i now youre saying for me to keep in contact with him, but that' s not enough. Talking online has NEVER been as fun as being in the same place as him, luaghing it up and goofing off. (goddamn crickets bugging the hell out of me)

Sorry if I get off topic, but I'm going to. I can't remember when, but not to long ago I woke up and I could tell it wasn't going to be a good day. I woke up and I felt like shit. But I pulled myself together like always and headed over to the apartment. It belongs to my brother and his friend, dan, but I've always referred to it as Dan's apartment or just The Apartment. I get there and guess who's there. EXACTLY WHO I DON"T WANT TO BE. I walk in to see Maggie and Skyler on the couch. (or maybe I got there and THEN they came over) DOesn't matter, they were there and of course I wished to talk to neither of them. I stayed anyway and afterward EVERYONE at the apartment seemed to angry at me, Tracy, Dan, Matt was at work so he didn't. SO? So I left, I didn't want to be there. I went home to find my nephews visiting and I left for some dinner. I thought about stuff while I ate and found some peace in the great food. Afterward I drove to grounds to find some nicer people and by some miracle I did. I chatted with Doug, Carmen, and some other guy for a total of 15 seconds before they left and headed inside. I actually felt better after talking to some friendlier people. Wait, matt was there, he and Tracy were arguing. Anyway I went inside and found nobody there I knew or wished to talk to and I decided to think. I didn't feel like driving, so I walked. I did. All the way to the apartment. You might not know this, but that is a LONG way. I got there and guess who was STILL there. This time Maggie and Skyler were arguing and Matt was outside in the Ben's Table's parking lot. Tracy said she was angry with him as we talked outside on the curb. I told her if she came back out and I wasn't there she should go looking for me (I didn't say for her not to worry about me, it's just that it would be impossible to find me again and I may not come back) As I got up to walk away Matt came up and I told him to go talk to Tracy, I have no idea whether he took the advice or not, but I felt like should give him advice anyway.

I walked. I walked for a long time. I got all the way to route 6 and all the while thinking how easy it wold be to just keep walking. And after I got there I realized that it wouldn't be as easy as I'd hoped. I didn't have much money and I'm no good at surviving in the woods, afterall it was already dark. I had TOO much to lose by giving up, and it wouldn't have sloved anything. As far as I could figure I was upset about losing my friends to college. I got back to the apartment and forgot that I wanted to walk to figure out what was making me so upset in the first place and never figured out a thing. Tracy and Dan tried to help but with what? How can anyone help out if YOU don't even know what's wrong. I still don't know what was wrong but writing about it makes me want to take a very LONG walk...